Well, this week I was finding bit difficult to choose the topic for writing the blog post. Finally I came up with an idea to write about LOVE,something which everyone is looking for in this world.
What is love ????
LOVE has always been the most difficult word to describe but yes, the best feeling which immediately changes your inner and outer environment. Nothing seems good without it. A world without love means an ocean without water. Not only human beings but all the the living creatures are looking for it badly.
Do we express our love in a right way???
We have different ways to show are love for othets. Does the feeling you want to show are being correctly understood by othet person ? I doubt.
Sometimes, in our life a situation comes when we do our best to make our loved ones happy but the result comes out as a zero. Our attempt to make other person feel wanted and loved failed.We feel depressed and sad.
Why do we fail to understand the love expressed by others?
The answer to this question lies in the following examples.
● A wife cooks a special dish for the husband on their anniversary. He tastes it and praises her but the wife is not happy??? Poor husband is not able to understand ! He has appreciated her efforts but she is reacting like this ???The reason being here that she was expecting a gift , may be a smaller one, on that particular day as her way to show love.(Gifts- a language of love for her)
Take one more example,
● Today is Janith’s mom’s birthday. She brings a beautiful bouquet and a dress of her choice to give her as a surprise. The mother is not happy????
The reason , she was not looking for the gift rather she wanted to spent some hours with her. ( A quality time – a language of love for her)
In both the cases, the language of love was different. The language of love for Janith was giving and receiving gift while for the mother was a quality time. Both were not able to understand the language of each other,both were not happy despite being putting efforts.
Same is the case in all the relationships. Most of the times we fail to understand the language of our partner, a friend, our children in our busy life. There is always a possibility that you language of love is different from the other person. You are expressing your love by giving gifts but the other person is expecting may be some quality time or some words of affirmations.
Why should we know about different languages of love ???
You can make the other person feel eanted only if you know different languages of love .
According to Gary Chapman, there are five languages of love.
1. Words of appreciation or affirmation
2. Giving or receiving gifts
3. Acts of service i.e. taking care
4. Quality time
5. Physical touch such as hugs
Every person has his own language of love. You have to understand the language of other person to make him feel loved. It is like speaking the same language for each other. For this you have to discover his language by putting your language aside.
Sometimes, you may have felt that your wife is never been happy inspite the fact that you are going to market , bringing the groceries or getting the kids ready for the school ,Yet she complains you that you do not love her .It is because you feel loved when other person does this for you.
Your language of love is showing care for other. Not neccesarily ,it is a her language of love also. May be she feel loved when you spent some quality time with her or a small hug from you or a small flower or chocolate.
Discover the love languages of your loved ones.
We need to discover the language of each other. It is not only for married people but with kids too. If you are coming from a foreign tour and have brought many gifts. You expect you child to be happy but she or he is not. May be he or she was expecting a tight hug ,not the gifts. Understand what the other person expect from you.
How can we make the other person feel loved??
By speaking their language of love .
In a nutshell, what is important to find the language of your loved loves so that you reciprocate the love in same manner and make the other person feel loved by putting your efforts in a right direction.
I am really thankful to Gary Chapman who has written such a wonderful book ( 5 languages of Love) that has helped me a lot to understand this concept of love and created a such a positive impact in my life.
Now you can answer to this question if somebody tell you – dear, you do not love me ?
Tell that– I love you but my way if expressing love is different from you. Please understand .
If the person feels difficult to understand – Show this article and tell him or her to read??
Feel free to share on WhatsApp or facebook or any other social media to make the world understand the languages of love.